Part three
‘Sure Juanita, how could I ever forget Rio?’
Even now, after so many years, it is all vividly painted in my memory. I will never forget those good times together with Juanita and my sweet little Dolores.
On long weekends we made excursions to the Green Coast, where Juanita had the free use of a beachfront cottage from a friend. It was in a secluded harbour with such calm, deep green-blue waters. At night we used to sit on the jetty, holding hands and letting some of our dreams surface.
‘I feel so comfortable having you by my side.’ Juanita told me many times on those occasions.
‘It is nice to know I can lean my head on your shoulder, and again feel the warmth of a man’s body close to mine. I know, you are not mine, and I know that you never will be. I know this it is only an illusion and that soon you will return to your country, to your normal life. You have a wife there, waiting for you, and I don’t want her to suffer those infernal torments which I have been through.’
‘I wish to come back to Rio soon and create a new life with you, Juanita.’
‘Yes Bill, till that day you when you’ll be back I’ll be contented to have you in this way, on borrowed time. Contented with the good moments we are lovers and we are lost in our dreams. I enjoy with you the physical contact of our bare skins, and the way you breathe heavily at the moment you are reaching that moment of glory and you are warmly throbbing inside me…I can’t deny, I love you for all the moments of ecstasy you infuse in me and I don’t want to lose you. Just for now I don’t want to look to the future. I’m happy to sit with you on the jetty and have the moon look at us, an accomplice in our union.’
‘I know how difficult this is for you, my love, but at the moment I can offer you so little.’
“I have come to love you, Bill, and I want you to be mine now and to give me what I need. I like the smell of you, I like the way you hold me at night, the way our bodies are twined in the knot of love, the sensation of having you deep inside me and, in those moments, I feel free, loved, and possessed by you. I am yours and I want to be yours for the rest of the time you are in Brazil. Then, after that, let it be a good dream, let the good memories be an evanescent shadow in us. Those shadowed memories in the future, will keep our love alive forever. It would never be spoiled, because we have put into it the best of our beings, because it has just matured. Mostly, our love will be kept alive because we have stopped in time, before any decay could contaminate it.’
Yes, Juanita was right with what she said.
After I left Rio I thought of her with more passion and desire. I often craved her, the sensual body and the salty taste of it when I was kissing her curvaceous figure. Yes, she was a great lover. In her was the brio and the warmth of that tropical paradise where she was born. In her existed some mixed beliefs and credos. In her was the well educated western English teacher as well as the primordial woman perpetrating the magic of the Voodoo to exalt her womanly capacities of powers, her eroticism and exoticism. She was capable of creating the sensation and the desire that a man wants. Juanita knew well those secrets inbuilt by the magic of the voodoos. I have to admit that she had always been generous with me. She never wanted to possess me. She only took me on a temporary basis, not forever, because she never wanted to spoil the beauty of our time together. She wanted to preserve it pure and fresh, to be kept as a memory for the future.
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